I am a feminist, but… Sometimes I use the fact that I am a woman to my advantage.
I am a feminist, but… I secretly believe all men should have at least a basic knowledge of DIY.
I am a feminist, but… I like that he is the breadwinner.
I’m a feminist, but… although I will offer to go halves on a first date, I will judge anybody who agrees.
I believe in the above, I believe that men and women deserve equality. But I also believe we are different animals and so achieving equality in all aspects of our lives is impossible, and quite frankly, stupid.
Mother always taught me that keeping a man happy was easy – feed him, make him feel needed and er… the other thing. Mother has also never managed to hold down much of a long term relationship so I’m taking her advice with a pinch of salt, but ultimately, I think she is on to something.
A lot of men, not all, but a lot of men like to feel needed. Whether that is to open a jar, put up a shelf, or protect you in a dangerous situation, being that person allows them to feel as though they are doing their job correctly. And biologically this makes sense, they are bigger, they are taller and broader and more muscular – men are, or have the potential to be, stronger than women – FACT.
So, yes, I do judge a man that doesn’t offer to walk a woman home after dark. Is that wrong?
It is the female aspect of things where I start to come undone. Boyfriend calls me a ‘Champagne Feminist’…
If I believe men are our natural ‘protectors’ and ‘providers’ does that mean we cannot do these things for ourselves? No way, bro. Do I believe that women are these submissive creatures that must be wrapped in cotton wall? Hell no. So, if I have placed men into a nice, neat little box, why does doing the same for women somehow not sit well with me?
A guy at work doesn’t like seeing a woman drinking a pint and we call him ridiculous. But realistically, if I saw a man drinking a Cosmo, would I approach him? Err… No.
I am creating a thousand double standards in my head to the point where I am questioning what I actually believe. From my experience, this is what I know:
Men are strong, they are hilarious, irrational, loving and emotional. Men cry, they fight and are outright disgusting at times.
And women? Women are the same… So maybe we aren’t so different after all?